Erin Nealy Cox Shares Lessons on Leadership, Mentorship, and Resilience with ÕýÆ·À¶µ¼º½ Law Students
Drawing on her extensive experience across public and private sectors, Cox emphasized flexibility, integrity, and mentorship as keys to long-term success.
“You don’t have to know today what ultimately you’re going to be doing for the rest of your life,” Cox told the audience. “I think that in law school, you sort of get into this track where you’re like, ‘Okay, I’m supposed to know what I’m supposed to do,’ and that’s just not reality.”
A National Perspective
Born in 1970 in Pascagoula, Mississippi, she earned a Bachelor of Business Administration in finance from The University of Texas at Austin, followed by a J.D., magna cum laude, from ÕýÆ·À¶µ¼º½ Dedman School of Law.
During her time at ÕýÆ·À¶µ¼º½, she served as editor of the ÕýÆ·À¶µ¼º½ Law Review from 1994 to 1995 and was a staff member from 1993 to 1994. She was also inducted into the Order of the Coif, an honor society for law school graduates, in recognition of her academic excellence.
Cox graduated from Dedman Law in 1995 and has held roles in both federal government and private industry. She began her legal career with clerkships for the Fifth Circuit and the Northern District of Texas before working at Simpson Thacher in New York and returning to Dallas to focus on trial practice.
After nearly a decade as an Assistant U.S. Attorney for the Northern District of Texas, she took an unexpected step: leading the Dallas office of cybersecurity firm Stroz Friedberg as an Executive Managing Director. It was not a legal role, but rather an operational and business leadership position.
“I was not a lawyer at Stroz Friedberg. I was the Executive Managing Director,” said Cox. “It was a business position…I was running a business. I had a P&L responsibility and I was in charge of hiring and firing. And those skills helped me become a better all-around attorney.”
She returned to government service in 2017 when President Donald Trump appointed her U.S. Attorney for the Northern District of Texas. The office, headquartered in Dallas, is one of the busiest in the country.
“If the Northern District of Texas were a state, it would be the 10th largest state in the union,” Cox said.
During her tenure, she prioritized combating violent crime, public corruption, and human trafficking. Notably, her office prosecuted significant public corruption cases involving Dallas city officials and led initiatives against opioid distribution and white supremacist gang activities. The district prosecuted more criminal defendants than any other non-border district.
Cox also served as Chair of the Attorney General’s Advisory Committee and met regularly in Washington with DOJ leadership to discuss national enforcement priorities.
“We would go to D.C. every six weeks to talk about the issues that were impacting everyone. We could bring to them what we were seeing in the field, and they could tell us what they were seeing at a national level. We were the first people to hear what was happening in Seattle when COVID was just beginning.”
After resigning in January 2021, she joined Kirkland & Ellis as a partner in Dallas. Erin represents corporations and boards of directors involved in high stakes criminal cases, internal investigations, and corporate integrity matters. She maintains a broad practice focused on matters arising from alleged violations of state and federal laws, including fraud, cybersecurity, public corruption, national security, workplace compliance, and issues involving board governance. She has been recognized by Chambers USA and Lawdragon for her work in these areas. 
Since joining Kirkland, Erin has launched “Project Second Chance,” a pro bono initiative assisting victims of domestic violence and human trafficking in expunging related criminal records. Since its inception in 2022, the program has helped 73 clients clear 232 charges. She has been recognized by Law360 and Lawdragon for her work in these areas. 
Beyond her legal practice, Cox is actively involved in community and professional organizations. She serves on the board of New Friends New Life, supporting victims of human trafficking, and is a member of the American Law Institute. Her accolades include the 2020 Jane Doe Award from Genesis Women’s Shelter and recognition in D Magazine’s “Best Lawyers in Dallas.” 
Her broad experience across legal and business settings has shaped how she advises clients today. “I think once you've made those decisions, you definitely take a more national perspective about your practice,” she said. “I have more cases in districts outside of Texas than I do in Texas.”
On Mentorship and Gender Gaps
Throughout her remarks, Cox emphasized the importance of mentorship and real-world learning. She urged students to be proactive in seeking out experienced lawyers from whom they could learn—not just in theory, but in day-to-day work.
“Figure out who the best lawyers are in the city that you want to practice in—maybe that’s Dallas, maybe that’s not. Go try and work for them. Make sure that you learn from the people that have the reputation that you want to have one day.”
She also addressed gender disparities in legal leadership. While serving as U.S. Attorney, Cox was one of only eight women in the country holding that role.
“It wasn’t a matter of output. It was more a matter of input,” she said. “Like, there were 30 people applying—only three women. We have to get the numbers up if we are concerned about the output.”
Cox encouraged students—especially women—not to self-select out of competitive opportunities.
Advice for New Lawyers
Cox also spoke directly to the realities of firm life for junior associates, particularly when managing workloads or declining additional assignments.
When asked a cquestion about balancing it all, Cox responded, “that's such a good question, because I think one of the most difficult aspects of being a young lawyer is the communications around that.”
Her advice: communicate early and clearly.
“Keeping it to yourself is not the key. Moderating capacity is the key. You should be able to have a conversation with people that you're working with like, ‘Oh, I would love to help you on this new case, but I have these six other cases that have my time. So, in a couple of weeks I'll be able to jump on.’
“You’re not saying no. Importantly, you’re not saying no. You’re just saying, ‘Not now.’”
She described that kind of honest dialogue as a critical professional skill—and one she expects from the young lawyers she works with today.
Leading Through Adversity
One of the most personal and moving parts of the discussion came when she shared her recent experience with a cancer diagnosis. While undergoing intensive treatment, she made the decision to continue working full-time at Kirkland & Ellis.
“I made a decision that I was not going to stop working or take leave. I was going to continue working pretty much full time. I had to be very honest and upfront with my clients about what I was going through.”
Her clients responded with patience and support.
“I had clients that said, ‘You know what? We’ll wait…We’re still going to hire you.’”
In a profession that celebrates perfectionism, Cox reminded the audience of something more powerful: vulnerability and authenticity
Reflecting on that time, she said, “It’s not a year I would recommend or repeat, but I definitely got more blessings out of that year than anything else.”
A Return to Presence
As the conversation closed, Cox offered one final piece of advice—one that she acknowledged may be unpopular in a post-pandemic workplace.
“You cannot learn the practice of law over Zoom. It’s not possible,” she said. “The law is an apprenticeship, and you need to be around other lawyers to learn.”
She encouraged young lawyers to prioritize in-office time, not for appearances, but for the informal learning opportunities that arise through collaboration and proximity.“You take it one step at a time and surround yourself with people that can help and support you to get through it.”
Key Takeaways from Erin Nealy Cox
1. You Don’t Have to Have It All Figured Out
“You don’t have to know today what ultimately you’re going to be doing for the rest of your life.” Cox’s career is a testament to nonlinear growth. From clerking to private practice, to cybersecurity business leadership, and then back to the DOJ—her journey invites young professionals to see exploration as a strength, not a failure.
Takeaway: Early career lawyers (and professionals in general) should focus on trajectory, not destination. Choose opportunities that offer mentorship, growth, and engagement—not just prestige.
2. Public and Private Experience Makes You a Better Lawyer
“I’m always a little bit concerned when I encounter a federal prosecutor that’s never been in the private sector. Prosecutors who have that experience [of representing defendants]—it imbues fairness to the position.”
Cox's ability to lead with empathy and perspective came from seeing both sides—defense and prosecution, business and justice.
Takeaway: Diverse experience across sectors isn’t a detour; it’s your foundation for integrity and strategic wisdom.
3. Mentorship Is Mission-Critical
“Figure out who the best trial lawyers are…introduce yourself to them…try to start working for them.”
Mentors were pivotal in shaping Cox’s career. She emphasized finding mentors based on reputation and a track record of excellence.
Takeaway: Be intentional and bold in seeking mentors. Learn from the people whose careers and values you admire.
4. Women Must Apply, Not Just Aspire
“It wasn’t a matter of output…only three women applied.”
Despite rising numbers of women in law schools, the profession still loses too many bright women to systemic challenges.
Takeaway: Leadership, for men and women, requires courage, community, and stepping up—even when the odds aren’t perfect.
5. Soft Skills are Power Skills
“Nobody calls a firm and asks for ‘whoever.’ They call the person they trust.”
Character traits, like grit, trust, collaboration, and communication, are just as essential as legal doctrine.
Takeaway: Soft skills are not secondary; they’re the cornerstone of influence and leadership.
6. Vulnerability Can Be a Strength
“I had to be very honest and upfront…and clients said, ‘We’ll wait.’”
She kept working while undergoing cancer treatment, redefining strength not as invincibility but as honesty in adversity.
Takeaway: Being vulnerable and real doesn’t weaken your professional presence—it humanizes and elevates it.
7. Law Is an Apprenticeship—Show Up
“You cannot learn the practice of law over Zoom. It’s not possible.”
Cox emphasized the irreplaceable value of in-person learning, mentoring, and hallway moments.
Takeaway: If you want to grow fast and strong, be physically present with mentors, teams, and challenges. Show up and step in.
8. Resilience Is Built One Day at a Time
“You take it one step at a time and surround yourself with people who can help.”
Her message? Resilience isn’t heroic. It’s daily. It’s community. It’s courage quietly repeated.
Takeaway: In law and in life, resilience is a muscle you build with presence, honesty, and support.